Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom with Dr. Christiane Northrup AND Elaine Paige: Celebrating a Life on Stage

Tonight I watched two PBS Pledge specials back to back.  I know!  You would think it was Christmas.  Both featured two highly revered ladies with decades of experience in their areas.  One sings and the other talks about menopause.   Can you guess who said/sang what?

1. Don't Cry For Me, Argentina.
2. Menstrual blood has stem cells in it.
3. Most people don't get enough iodine since converting to sea salt.
4. I Dreamed a Dream.
5. Think of your body as a tree.
6. Think of your body as an organic garden.
7. I Know Him So Well.
8. I Don't Know How To Love Him.
9. The umbilical cord can pulsate up to 30 minutes after birth if not clamped right away.
10. Memory.

  (RE: Memory.  In high school, I was a full-time Broadway musical geek.  And yet I fell asleep during Cats.  Just sayin'.  Also, tonight when the intro to Memory started, most of the audience clapped.  After that died down, Elaine Paige sang "Midnight..." and a few more clapped.  Personally, I think those people should be evicted from the theatre.  Because really?  One of the most famous songs ever and you don't know it until the lyrics start? Tsk tsk.)  

So what else did I learn from the Diva and the OB/GYN?  That Elaine Paige can continue performing well past menopause if she follows her inner body wisdom and cuts down to under 15 grams of sugar a day.  

Masterpiece Mystery: Miss Marple "The Mirror Crack'd From Side to Side"

I did not mean to intentionally skip the three Foyle's War episodes of Masterpiece Mystery.  I just got busy with life.  And by life I mean work, errands and the Lost series finale. 

So Miss Marple.  With her and Hercule Poirot and all the other classic sleuths, I cannot help but think of the brilliant movie Murder By Death.  (This and What's Up, Doc? are two of my all-time favorite comedies.  They will both forever make me laugh.)  If you love Agatha Christie, check it out. Bonus! Truman Capote as Lionel Twain.

OK. Back to Miss Marple.  I don't see how anyone cannot enjoy a good old-fashioned Agatha Christie mystery.  They are just so "That's curious", "Something struck me as odd" and "Inspector, you are over looking the obvious!"  And of course, I always try to work out the mystery along with Miss Marple.  I'm usually wrong.  Probably because I don't have the advantage of constantly coming across murders wherever I go like the Miss.  There was a great exchange in The Mirror Crack'd... when the Inspector tells Miss Marple that it was quite the coincidence that the woman who helped her with her ankle is now dead.  And all Miss Marple says is "Yep." (Paraphrase.) 

Perhaps once I watch more of the Marple, I'll be able to catch on better.  Although, I was overdoing it last night:  I was convinced that the movie star's much younger husband was actually her adopted son.  Why?  I don't listen to Miss Marple when she says "Don't overlook the obvious."  Well, in my defense, she had the script and I didn't. 

Quick recap of Mirror Crack'd: Movie star Marina Gregg buys Marple's pal estate. Neighbor dies at garden party at estate.  And then it goes from there.  (Want to know who did it?  Spoiler below!)

Miss Marple is played by Julia McKenzie...from Cranford!  Weird that I saw her as Marple last year and did not make the connection when Cranford rolled around.  But when I watched Mirror Crack'd, I thought, "The lady with Bessie the cow!"  That's yet another thing I love so much about the Masterpiece Theatre shows: you see a lot of the same actors and since they are not famous in America, you feel like they are your own personal discovery.  (Although Mirror Crack'd did have Joanna Lumley as Marple's nosy friend Dolly and Lindsay Duncan as the murderer...sorry, I meant to say the movie star, Marina Gregg.  I would say that between AbFab and HBO's Rome, respectively, they are fairly known in the US.)  But is Hugh Bonneville a household name?  In my household, yes.  He might be recognized from Notting Hill but he was also in Lost in Austen, the Mansfield Park movie and here he plays the Inspector with a bum arm.  Which is never explained.  Maybe he shows up again to explain it! *hopeful clap clap*

To further express my Masterpiece Actor Nerdom, I should confess that I always go to IMDB and look up the cast.  So that I can say to myself, "I knew I recognized the girl who played the photographer!  She was on Foyle's War two weeks ago!" 

What did I learn from Miss Marple: The Mirror Crack'd From Side to Side?  I see these actors more than my relatives.

American Experience: Into the Deep: America, Whaling and the World

Whaling. Would I have ever watched this had I not been reading Moby Dick?  That's easy to answer: no.  I would have read the description, passed judgment and then seriously considered Dancing With the Stars.  But because of The Whale, I actively reminded myself and made sure my snacks were in place for the 8 pm start time.  (A quick moment to explain why Moby Dick since I'm obviously not in tenth grade: NPR's Monkey See blog started the "I Will If You Will" Book Club Dare.  First book was Twilight.  If you read my other blog, it goes without saying that I did not read along with that one.  So Moby Dick is a natural second choice, right? Palate cleanse, I call it.) OK, ready, set, whale.

I took a lot of notes.  And was amazed by how much I've retained so far from Moby Dick.  It's a bit of work to get through some chapters.  But as Into the Deep explained whaling techniques tonight, I impressed myself with the faint ennui of "yawn, I know this already".  Wake me when you have some relevatory spermaceti facts.  (Explanation! Spermaceti is the coveted substance inside the sperm whale's head.  According to the show, it is "clear as vodka" but when air hits it, it looks like semen.  Hence the name.)

All the spermaceti talk, history of whaling, and other details are hung upon the story of the Essex whaling ship that sunk in 1820 as a result of a sperm whale ramming into the side of it.  The survivors took to lifeboats and made a really bad decision.  "Hey, let's not go to the near island because there may be cannibals.  Instead, let's go three times as far back to South America, get off course, and then resort to cannibalism to stay alive!" 

Herman Melville was inspired (or obsessed, more like) by the Essex tragedy to write his whale adventure that he was convinced was his masterpiece.  The general public? Not as convinced.  According to the show, America was all about the West and whaling was "out".  

Celebrity Voice Over Alert!  Willem Defoe narrates and Robert Sean Leonard reads the Moby Dick passages.  He even makes a brief appearance where he looks at the camera and says (and I say simultaneously because I know it's coming), "Call me, Ishmael."  I then grabbed the remote to mute because I'm only on Chapter LXXI.

But prior to spoilers, what did I learn from Into the Deep? 

There was a Golden Age of Whaling.  About 1820 to the Civil War.  After that whaling declined and, towards the end of WWI, whale ships made more money as props in silent movies than in whaling. 

After a whale is harpooned, one of three things can happen: whale smashes boat, whale dives down  deep, whale takes off.  Whale taking off was known as "Nantucket Sleigh Ride" because the boats are dragged by the fleeing whale. 

Another fun whale phrase is "Chimneys Afire!"  AKA multiple-stabbed whale spouting blood out of its blowhole.  Clever. 

Oh, and the fact that the "sperm" in sperm whale actually refers to sperm. I guess I was giving it the benefit of the doubt...

Great Performances: Hamlet

Spoiler Warning! 

No, not the fact that almost all the characters die at the end.  The spoiler is this:  Claudius, played by Patrick Stewart, when threatened with the poisoned rapier by Hamlet to drink the poisoned wine, shrugs.  Yes, shrugs!  As in, "Might as well." It's a moment that I ran back two or three times to make sure I wasn't hallucinating.  And you know what?  I loved it!  Yes, I laughed.  And although it was pretty jarring in such a tragic scene, I loved it.  Why?  Because that one little shrug said everything.  "Well, Hamlet is pretty much dead, my wife is dead, and I've been exposed as a murderer, so..."  One would expect a long dramatic pause coupled with "forgive me" eyes that would take up a few minutes of screen time.  Oh no.  Stewart said, "Let's just cut to the chase."  Shrug.  Drink. Done.

And you want to know how much the shrug captivated me?  I mentioned that first and not the fact that David Tennant played Hamlet.  Or the fact that Tennant wears jeans, no shoes and a red, t-shirt with a six-packed torso printed on it.  Or the fact that he's quite good.  And in jeans. 

This Hamlet is not quite the filmed stage version that I expected, although the same Royal Shakespeare Company director and cast return to reprise their roles.  Instead, they use real locations as well as footage from surveillance cameras at times to coincide with the modern take.  But that doesn't mean the performances are taken down to minute, eye-twitch film levels.  There's still passion a-poppin'!  Weeping, clutching, yelling, jumping in graves, crazy talk.  All that tragic Shakespearey goodness. 

Just want to take a moment to give a shout out to Horatio.  I love that character and could go on and on about how Horatio and Hamlet are the true love story.  No, I'm not suggesting that Horatio and Hamlet were lovers.  I just believe that their friendship and trust was the through line of the play and the only one unbroken.  Blah, blah, blah, nothing new, I'll stop.  Just give Horatio the props he deserves. 

What did I learn from this Hamlet?  *shrugs*

Big Bird PBS Ad

A little girl answers her door to find Big Bird standing there.  Big Bird takes her hand.  He leads the girl to the tearing down of the Berlin Wall, on a safari, marching through a Suffrage demonstration, to a ballet, through the markets in India and then to the Moon.  

Am I the only cynic who thought, "Big Bird just abducted that child!"?  (He did bring her home after their adventures but...sigh.  It just shows that my innocence is lost...)

Oh, and there's the other PBS Ad where the mom is reading to her child and Jim Lehrer, some animated character, the This Old House guy (I think) and others are in the room, making comments.  

I, of course, thought, "That child is going to have nightmares."

What did I learn from those ads?  Time to reclaim my sense of wonder.  Or to check for Jim Lehrer under my bed each night...

The Buddha

At one point in The Buddha, an interviewee recites a quote about reincarnation: "like going through junior high over and over again." So that's how Buddhism gets around the "no Hell" thing.  Make everyone re-live their awkward phases for lifetime after lifetime.  Makes me shudder. 

I was looking forward to this two hour film by David Grubin because I don't really know much at all about Buddha except for what Deepak Chopra would tweet.  (Confession: I hated to do it but I de-followed him on Twitter because he over-tweeted.  Five tweets in a row? No, Deepak, I only tolerate five tweets a day from each Twit.) 

The Buddha tells the story of Prince Siddhartha and his enlightenment into the Buddha with some history and commentary and cartoons and Richard Gere voice-overs along the way.  His mom the Queen had a dream that he would either be a bigtime ruler or the Buddha.  The King was partial to the former so he sheltered the heck out of Siddhartha.  Food, entertainment, chicks, you name it.  Long story short: Siddhartha ventures out of the kingdom four times and sees first a sick man, then an old man, then a dead man, and then on the fourth trip he sees a spiritual seeker.  He learns that he can get sick, he will grow old and he will die.  So he wants to know how to escape that pain.  Longer story shorter: he seeks, he fasts, he sits under the bodhi tree, he's tested by some crazy-armed lord of temptation god and then he becomes the Buddha.  I'm sure I left some stuff out. 

I find all of this fascinating but I'll admit that I watched it late at night and I briefly fell asleep.  And weirdly, I woke up to Buddha saying, "Remember me as the one who woke up."  Huh.  And there was more nuggets of wisdom prior to my catnap so...

What did I learn from The Buddha?

Favorite quote about Balance: "The string is too tight, it snaps and the music dies. The string is too slack, it makes no sound and the music dies.  There is a middle way."  (Buddhism according to Goldilocks!)

Siddhartha called his newborn son, Fetter.  He called his son "ball and chain"!  And then he took off to seek.  This was before he learned the whole 'balance' thing, I guess.

"No knowledge won without sacrifice." And "in order to gain anything, you must first lose everything." To me that means, "give up that ignorance, folks."

Four Noble Truths: 1. There is suffering (dissatisfaction) in the world. 2. Our minds cause suffering.  3. You can be free of suffering by understanding the cause.  4. Follow the Eightfold Path.  (They didn't go into the Eightfold Path but I have them in my notes somewhere from a Deepak PBS Pledge Drive special.  Not from his tweets.)

Buddhism is about being ordinary and doing human things. Everyone can be a Buddha. 

Pay attention.  Balance. Compassion.  Be smart about desires. Change must come from within. Everything is connected.  Everyday life is already miraculous.  The Buddha is available on BluRay and DVD.

And check out the Buddha Mahjong game!  Here!

Masterpiece Classic: Sharpe's Challenge

I'm new to Sharpe's world.  So new in fact that I thought this was the first Sharpe movie.  IMDB laughed and said, "Silly child, this is the 15th Sharpe movie."  For those of you who thought Sean Bean sat around between Patriot Games and Lord of the Rings, you are sadly mistaken.  And when I say you, I mean me.  He-of-the-Awesome-Name was starring in fourteen Sharpes.  (And I love that they are all named "Sharpe's something".   Like Sharpe's Rifle and Sharpe's Battle.  And at sixteen movies with next week's Sharpe's Peril, they're going to start running out of manly, adventurey words.  Can't wait for Sharpe's Holiday!)

So Sharpe's Challenge can really only be described correctly using the word "swashbuckling".  There are sword fights and damsels in distress and cannons and rifles and drinking and femme fatales and traitors and other stuff my dad loves.  (Mental note: ask Dad if he's read the novels by Bernard Cornwell and if not, birthday gift done.)  Challenge opens with the traitorous Dodd slaughtering the entire British army unit in an Indian camp.  Dodd left no one alive...or did he?  Yep, Sharpe was there and witnessed the whole thing. While playing dead.  Dodd is played by Toby Stephens aka Maggie Smith's son.  I have only seen Stephens play bad guys like the Bond villain in Die Another Day.  And because of his skill at being smarmy and ambitious and evil, he creeps me out.  But I'm sure he's lovely in person.

Years after that massacre, Sharpe is back in India to find a friend who will soon become his Irish sidekick, Harper.  Then the two have to rescue General Burroughs' daughter who was kidnapped by...wait for it...Dodd!  Dodd "gifted" her to the evil Raja.  Dodd is in cahoots with the Raja's Regent played by Padma Laksmi.  Yes, all you Top Chef fans: Padma is playing a conniving ex-concubine.  There's a great scene where Dodd's men cut off a British lieutenent's head and I immediately thought, "Utensils down! Hands up!"  I'm a Top Chef nerd.

Meanwhile, Sharpe is having to contend with the British troops that aren't stepping up fast enough to attack the Raja.  Specifically, General Simmerson.  Simmerson is the character that hates Sharpe for some past reason or perhaps no reason at all.  Sharpe interrupts Simmerson while he's getting his hair cut.  Simmerson says, "What fresh madness is this?" (I'm stealing that line.) And Sharpe says he's going to rescue the daughter.  Simmerson says, "I don't mind if you do die..." Sharpe: "If that's permission..." Simmerson: "Go and die."  Not quite "good luck".

As this was set in British-occupied India, Challenge did a good job of balancing Brits and Indians being both good guys and bad guys.  Although both main good Indians, the cavalry leader and the Raja's sister, said something along the line of "I'm helping you but I really don't want you here".  But the cavalry guy apologizes to Sharpe after the final battle and he's dying.  Perhaps he expired before saying, "But really consider leaving our country please."

One negative of Challenge: the British officer Bickerstaff who was so over the top and Dickensian in his villainy that I thought he was going to break out into "Master of the House".

What did I learn from Sharpe's Challenge? How to use "parlay" and "brigands" in a sentence.  Evil conspirators' romances never last.  In the middle of battle, respond to your inferiors by saying, "Damnit man. I will not have my story interrupted."